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Other Questions Sent To The Etiquette Authorities at the Neo-Nazi News Site

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On a neo-Nazi news site, a user asked advice on whether he could be a white nationalist if he slept with East Asian women, and he received dozens of spirited responses from both sides. New York Times, “The Alt-Right’s Asian Fetish” January 7, 2018

“A restaurant by my house has an all-you-can-eat fajitas special every Wednesday night. The fajitas are flavor-packed and made with an authentic guajillo adobe rub. They are so good that I frequently forego lunch on Wednesdays just so I can eat more fajitas! Can I still be a white nationalist if I partake in this all-you-can-eat fajitas special now and then? Thanks!” — Flummoxed by Fajitas, Somerville, MA

“The Alabama Aryan Brotherhood symbol tattooed on my ass looks more like the Hogwarts Crest from the Harry Potter books. While I believe that Harry Potter subtly encourages miscegenation, I don’t really feel like getting my ass re-tattooed. It hurts and it’s costly. Am I still a white nationalist if I keep the tattoo the way it is?” Wrong Wizard?, Mobile, AL

“I am life-long Pittsburgh Steelers fan. I recently received an Antonio Brown jersey as a gift. While he is a talented wide receiver, he is obviously not my favorite player. But the person who gave it to me might be offended if I exchange it for the jersey of my true favorite player, Ben Roethlisberger. Can I still be a white nationalist if I wear the Antonio Brown jersey?” Perplexed in Pittsburgh, Pittsburgh, PA

“A guy in my poker league invited his brother-in-law to play poker with us and now his brother in law wants to join the league! However, his brother in law is Jewish. Can I still be a white nationalist if I play poker with a Jewish man?” — Poker Chips & Chutzpah?, Baltimore, MD

“My fiancé wants our wedding song to be ‘All of Me’ by John Legend. While John Legend is a man of indeterminate racial origin, he is clearly not white. Can I still be a white nationalist if my new bride and I dance to this song? What if I merely sway with disinterest? How does the fact that her alternate song is ‘Marry You’ by Bruno Mars, also a man of indeterminate racial origin, affect your anlaysis?” — Befuddled Bridegroom, Bozeman, MT

“I know that these days, the fashion world is much more relaxed about what colors to wear and when; but I am a strict adherent to the notion that a lady does not wear white after Labor Day, especially not white cotton and especially not above the Mason Dixon line where it gets cold quick! Can I still be a white nationalist if I eschew my white cotton sheet and instead wear a cream-colored suede hoodie?” Alt-Right….Alt-White?, Buffalo, NY

“I recently masturbated to that Paula Abdul video where she is dancing with those cartoon cats. Am I still a white nationalist? What is the story with Paula Abdul anyway? Also, what is the story with cartoon cats?” — Xenophobic Wacker, Toledo, OH

“Quick follow-up question, is ‘Roethlisberger’ Jewish? If so, can I still wear his jersey? If not, does his name sound too Jewish? Thanks again.” — Perplexed in Pittsburgh

“My wife — let’s call her ‘Karen’ — loves to sing karaoke. Her go-to song is Bonnie Tyler’s ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ and it typically gets people pretty fired up. At the end of the night she gets many accolades for her performance and she now thinks she has a great voice. She is even talking about entering competitions. In reality, her singing voice is terrible. My wife is the love of my life and the nicest person I’ve ever known. I’m concerned for the future should someone ever be honest with her. Should I tell Karen the truth about her voice to save her from potential public embarrassment, or should I keep my mouth shut? Also, Karen is black. Can I still be a white nationalist?” Caucasian Cacophony, Williamsport, PA


Other Questions Sent To The Etiquette Authorities at the Neo-Nazi News Site was originally published in BullshitIST on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.



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